Today marks our three year anniversary… I honestly can’t believe it’s been three years since we said the big “I DO.” So much has happened and so much growth has occurred. From moving 4 times, to having a baby, being laid off, learning to budget, getting new jobs – you name it we’ve gone through it so far! It’s been the most exciting and maturing season of my life.
I have learned I’m stronger than I thought, yet it’s okay to be vulnerable. I am meant to do this life’s journey with Mike. We balance each other so well, because we are complete opposites. He loves to travel and be with people while I can be home reading a book and going to a park. It hasn’t been until recently I’ve found the beauty in our purpose and our foundation of friendship.
Our first year of marriage I questioned honestly how did we end up together and who did I marry? In the midst of me being laid off 3 months after getting married and living on one income – I felt robbed of our “honeymoon” phase. We should be traveling and staying out late, not counting pennies and me out of work. I started work again 3 months later in August and by December we found out we were pregnant. I cried looking at that positive pregnancy test. I had started my Masters degree and finally felt like we were “back on track.” I realize how selfish that was; thank God we didn’t stick to “my plan.”
So we moved. From our apartment on the fourth floor (I couldn’t imagine walking that after 5 months pregnant). Two dogs and a baby on the way we needed to save money…fast. And what better way then to live in a basement (insert sarcasm). All 4.5 of us in one room – and yet some of the best moments in our marriage so far. Between spiders and bugs and crating our pups all the time, we talked more. We found ways to solve problems and more importantly we really started to trust each other in a way we had not before. We felt Kai’s first kicks, played Red box movies on our laptop, and made too many late night runs to 7-Eleven. Sure we fought and some days felt so unbearable with a full family of 5 living above us, but we needed it. We saved money and learned about our relationship. I learned to pray more and not know if God would answer any of my prayers.
Two weeks before Kai was born we moved into our current home. 9 months pregnant in the heat of summer we packed our things and found the perfect spot we prayed for. Ironically we found it off of Craigslist! We welcomed a new baby, cried because we have more than one toilet to use, and embraced where we are now. Mike becoming a full-time pastor and us entering into the world of ministry was a turn I honestly never thought we would take I our lives. Parenting our amazing and intelligent son – while he insist he is a dog (including being caught drinking from the dog water multiple times…) has solidified our need for one another. Even this adventure of opening a business has opened so many doors for us.
When Mike and I had first gotten married I was still healing from a previously bad experience in ministry, a time that had left me very confused, not knowing my own identity, and carrying someone else’s shame. It rocked my world to be with someone who loved me and didn’t need something from me or based his love off of my “performance.” This last three years have helped me to regain my confidence, be a better friend, and restore what I felt had been completely lost. So I celebrate this year a little more than the last two. It’s going to be a fantastic one.
When Mike and I had first gotten married I was still healing from a previously bad experience in ministry, a time that had left me very confused, not knowing my own identity, and carrying someone else’s shame. It rocked my world to be with someone who loved me and didn’t need something from me or based his love off of my “performance.” This last three years have helped me to regain my confidence, be a better friend, and restore what I felt had been completely lost. So I celebrate this year a little more than the last two. It’s going to be a fantastic one.
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