Some secrets we’ve learned in nine years of marriage and counting

I cannot believe it’s a full nine years of being married! There’s so much redemption in our story not just as individuals, but together. It’s become one of the things I cherish about us. Challenges have brought us closer, made us stronger, and definitely the journey sweeter. The secrets we’ve learned in marriage have come through fire and strengthened over time.

Mike and I are fairly opposite, and over time we’ve found how to support and cover each other. I’m thankful to be celebrating nine years and counting with this guy! Though Mike is more behind the scenes of supporting my blogging endeavors; he helps brainstorm ideasand keeps me accountable to see its growth.

For this special post, Mike is joining me by answering a few questions. I love that he brought his unedited thoughts into our Anniversary Q&A. We’ll even be sharing some secrets we’ve learned along the way in marriage that will hopefully help you too!

Here’s what we had to say stepping into year nine:

1. What has been our best year of marriage so far?
   Mike: Last year, because of our experiences together. We went through a lot and we’ve grown in maturity. There’s a lot of trust between us.
   Carmen: Year 7 was our best year so far, because we really started to lean and trust each other. From work to parenting, and everything in between. But last year was definitely a year we connected on another level.
2. What’s one thing you want to accomplish this year?
   Mike: Get a vasectomy so we don’t have anymore kids. Aside from that really to redeem our time for our family. So much of our time was dictated and has gone by so quickly. This year I want our time to be where we create lasting memories for us and our kids.
   Carmen: I want to take an only us trip, like a weekend away.
3. What’s the best part of our marriage?
   Mike: After the kids go to bed… We are really good friends (he added when I’m not acting out)
   Carmen: I would have to agree with both, definitely our friendship.
4. What’s an area we still need to grow in?
   Mike: We’re always growing in our communicating intentionally to connect. We talk a lot, but we don’t always connect.
   Carmen: Always growing in communication, but making sure when we disagree it’s fair and not just out of anger.
5. What’s one thing you would not change about us?
   Mike: We are loyal to each other and really have each other’s backs. I know I can count on you.
   Carmen: Our way to see humor in almost anything. We find things to laugh at constantly.

Secrets we’ve learned in 9 years of marriage

There is so much advice out there and I can say if you filter through somethings can be truly valuable. Understanding, respecting, and staying engaged with your partner continues to make all the difference for us. When we first started dating I knew very little about relationships and what it meant to truly love someone intimately.

Stepping into marriage, kids, ministry, and life was a whirlwind I was not prepared for. However, through every disagreement and challenge these are the secrets that keep nine years and counting better than the last:

Forgive Daily. Allow Alone Time. Create New Memories. Enjoy the Little Things. Trust One Another. Laugh Often.

So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday. The Notebook

I wouldn’t want to do this journey with anyone else. Happy anniversary ♡