This past Sunday I had a student share with me how she didn’t want to continue in participating in the fine arts youth drama, because she felt like it was “too hard.” While I held her as she cried and did my best to encourage her, I couldn’t help but stop and cup her face in my hands. I looked her in the eyes and told her – “YOU. CAN. DO. HARD. THINGS.” Everything inside of me truly meant it as I affirmed the gifts I’ve seen in her and was surprised at how much her head and heart have been filled with this unspoken depth of doubt… she left undecided but I repeated those words to her, because they were true.
Later that evening I told Mike what happened and I mulled the words over in my head. This time last year I was prepping myself with goals for the new year and what I hoped to accomplish. I shared my one little word of stewardship in this post – truly hoping to focus and grow. As I saw others preparing their word for 2015, I really couldn’t narrow down one thing in particular. Sure I want to grow, I would love to show more grace, and be determined or disciplined in the tasks I set before myself…but it just didn’t feel right, you know? This past year really was about stewardship in my relationships, with my job, as a mother…but this year I really wasn’t sure.
2014 had many great moments, but boy was it challenging. So many hard things came throughout the year and I found myself feeling just like the student I recently was comforting – crying (sobbing many times), unsure, doubtful, and afraid to even face the things in front of me. We’ve all had seasons where it’s just hard. You wake up and it’s hard…you go to sleep and it feels even harder as you recall the events of the day. I’m not often a quitter, but I was ready. Then it clicked.