There seems to be an antidote to beautifully captured moments on the internet these days and it’s called “keepin it real.” None of us are strangers to the trend, however, I feel like the origins of this antidote along with its “victims” aren’t as harmless as they appear to be. I will say this post may be just for me and that’s fine, sometimes it helps to remind myself of some things. But if you can relate, please do.
We all take embarrassing photos, just like the one that greeted you on this post – but most people never see them. Why? Because they’re embarrassing! So we keep them hidden within our photo galleries or only share them with close friends for a good laugh. However, it seems that nowadays that’s not good enough. Having a “picture perfect” feed or the appearance of stunningly styled photos has become distasteful ironically. Being too perfect has now translated as being unreal – especially in the realm of the internet. No one wakes up with perfect hair or a contently smiling child…or an all white couch with a toddler… right? So how could anyone dare to put something up that even remotely portrays such a thing? You can’t falsely represent your life like that! This is the internet!!
Truthfully we’ve all thought it – but I realized the source of this “keepin it real” is based out of our own insecurities and comparison to others…and dare I say it jealously. Have you ever been jealous of someone who can get their child to pose just right? Or that their house always appears to jump right out of Home and Garden magazine? Or that someone can make cutting a stinkin’ orange look like a piece of art? Ever compare yourself to them as well? I know I have. So instead of appreciating the time and effort it takes to have that type of artistic point of view or even the fact that many people have based their financial livelihood on their brand which relates to their social media face – you buck up against with let me just keep it real, because ain’t nobody got time to post styled photos of chirruns… (okay that was a little drastic..but you know what I mean).
So you post the embarrassing photos…the not so cute photos, but hey you just have to let people know what’s really going on. Right? I had to take a hard look at myself when I started realizing that the same exact perspective was happening when I was trying to “keep it real” in my portrayal of my life on the internet. Things like:
and what I ended up doing and have done is sacrifice the areas of my life that are okay to stay private. That I should protect Kai’s image on the internet and what I say about my husband. How one day Kai will look at what I wrote about him and either cringe in disbelief and hurt… or be glad I didn’t tell the whole world how I felt in our darkest of moments. I had to come to grips that I needed a balance and I needed to stop “keepin it real” as a response to those who really may see their world as perfectly lit white couches with spotless milk vases filled with peonies – and appreciate that. Because I do like to look at those pictures too. I also love to cry and find comfort in other moms who have kids that do what my own kid did in this picture. But it’s a balance. A balance that should take into account who and what exposing your real includes.
It’s a great laugh at the moment…but unfortunately here the moment lasts a lifetime.
Disclaimer: I wrote this for myself, because I was really processing this whole “keepin it real” thing. What if I’m too “fake” and people don’t like “fake” so I gotta find something wrong to post or something that belittles the too much “fake” going on in my internet appearance. That’s too much work… Truth is I actually don’t like seeing a lot of pictures of people or even children in distress. In my line of work it gets to me easily when I see a child hurting, cause that’s all I deal with 8+ hours of my day. So I look to happier moments where people are loving one another and actually get the time to enjoy things that make them most content, like a baby sleeping with a dog. I guess it’s all in your perspective and motive. I love sharing the ups and downs of my life, but I realize my job will always be to make sure what I say and do will be something my own children won’t regret in the future. Nothing by any means is perfect, I guess that’s why I am pushing myself to be in those moments of reality versus just capturing them to share them on the sidelines with the rest of the world.